(Somewhat angry) Musings on the service industry

**I will warn you, I may sound like Debbie Downer here- this is five year’s worth of pent-up aggression…  don’t be mad**

The service industry sucks.  I’m about to speak in generalities, so to those of you who do not agree with me or do not illustrate what I am about to say, I apologize.  However, I guarantee you there are many other people who fill this “stereotype”, or, they agree with me and are willing to back me up on what I am saying.

First, the entire industry is one massive popularity contest.  Let’s begin with the establishment you (or someone you know) work(s) at, shall we?  It could have great food and wonderful drinks, or awful food and drinks, or perhaps land somewhere in the middle.  But guess what?  If it isn’t a popular destination (for whatever it is that it serves), whether based on it being a meet-market or its own true merits, that place is going to shutter its doors quickly.  

Beyond that, you have the staff. Nine times out of 10, you’ll find that the bartenders are the “most popular” out of the entire staff.  At a normally functioning establishment, they are going to make the most money out of anyone, especially if it’s a place that has a heavy bar-appeal.  Add in the fact that bartenders usually serve food as well, and that they are tipped out by the rest of the staff, and you can see why their position is typically so lucrative (in places that have little to no seating at the bar you will find that bartenders make about as much as a server, if not a bit less).  However, getting your break into bartending can be rather troublesome, and usually, you have to know someone to get your chance.

Let’s move on to servers, shall we?  Like the bartender, you either have to know someone to get your break (whether promoted from a host/hostess/busser/runner or hired from the outside with little to no experience) or really be quite the go-getter.  Don’t fool yourself- you’re still just a peon.  You are at the mercy of your kitchen, your manager, your bartender, and even your host/hostess/greeter.  If your host person seats you three times in a row, guess what? You just got triple sat.  Deal with it.  If your kitchen runs out of something or takes an enormously long time to prepare the ticket you’ve just sent, guess what?  There’s little to nothing you can do but apologize and smile to your table.  Don’t forget that you get to deal with everything coming back at you from the table, from a “Miss, miss!” across the establishment because A. your table didn’t take the time to listen when you told them your name and B. they are too impatient on getting their appetizers which you put in two minutes ago to sit there and wait- to an arm lifted shaking an empty glass because apparently, there is a race at table 20 to see who can down their Dr. Pepper the fastest.  Servers get it from all sides.

Not that servers don’t deserve some of what they’re getting.  Most of the time, these people you find bringing you your food and drink are either A. Working your way through college (the upper echelon of the breed) B. huge potheads C. alcoholics or “pre-alcoholics” or D. a train wreck who didn’t even finish high school and earns the most money possible considering their education by serving.  These people are either counting the minutes till they get home and can study for their midterm, or counting the minutes till the party after work.  Seen Waiting?  If you haven’t, you should, and if you have, many times the industry is much like what you see in that movie.

Performance is utterly subjective- no matter how much I smile or laugh at your dumb jokes, how quickly I get your food and beverages to the table, or how may little “modifiers” I remembered in order to make sure your food came out sans “anything you didn’t want”, if I breathe wrong you can decide you don’t like me.  Not only that, but you can decide to mess with my tip, not tip me at all, complain to my boss, or even get me fired.  In the end, your scale by which you judge me may not even be right, but you are the customer, so since you THINK I did a bad job (whether or not I did), I can find myself in hot water.  Let’s take in to the account that at the most (unless I’m serving in California or one of the other five states that do not have right-to-work laws and server minimum wage) I am probably making (at most) $4 an hour before tips.  In fact, if someone stiffs me on a tip, I'm not just missing out on a tip, I'm losing money.

Additionally, the schedule is horrendous for “normal” people.  If you are married or have children and plan on spending any time with your spouse or children (after they get out of school), you can pretty much kiss it goodbye as you will be expected to (for the majority) work nights and weekends.  If you don’t have friends outside the service industry, don’t plan on making many, because most of the opportunities you’ll have to meet people outside of the service industry happen while you’re at work.

Perhaps my favorite part is when people speak to me (or just look at me) like I am stupid.  I have a college education (that I paid for).  That means I am more educated (perhaps more intelligent) than 71% of Americans.  I wonder what the likelihood is that any table that talks down to me has more of an education than I do?

The service industry, while it may be fine for a short while, or may help one achieve certain goals in the short-run definitely wears on those within it.  For this young lady, I’ve had my fill of trying to be what everyone else wants me to be, and for now, I will worry about two things: 1. Finding the elusive “grown up job” that I (and many of my friends) are currently seeking and 2.  Worrying about what makes me (and my God) happy.  I figure if my focus stays there, I can’t go wrong.