The whole "Marine wife" thing.

Okay so maybe I'm not actually a "Marine wife" (yet), but I did move across the country to be with Joe, so I still feel the same.  Last night we were talking, and I told him that this has been a bit harder than I had previously anticipated, and he got a bit of a disappointed look on his face.  "Is this something you can handle?" he asked me, and of course I answered the only way I knew how: "Well, it isn't easy, but when has my life ever been easy? And also, what's my other option? Being in Arizona, jobless, living with my parents again, and without you?  This may not be a walk in the park, but I'm not going to trade it in for that either."  To which he responded, "Well they say the hardest job in the Marines is that of the Marine wife."  This got me thinking...

So I (and all the women who actually ARE married to their marine) do what I (we) can by supporting Joe (and all those other Marines we love).  Joe (and all those other Marines out there) have essentially stepped up and said they are willing to not only die for their country, but sacrifice their lives for it.  "But Jill," you say, "they are the same thing!"  No, my friends, they are not.  Everyone knows that when you enlist you are taking a chance that you may one day have to die for your country, but beyond that, you are also saying that your entire life will revolve around what your country asks of you.  Joe and I can't up and live anywhere in the country we decide, and although we can ask for a specific base, in the end it is out of our hands.  It is quite possible that I will have a hard time having a real career for as long as we are moving around, unless I am blessed to be hired by a company that just so happens to have offices near every base we are sent to (home and abroad).

Working at the bar, I've had the opportunity to talk to a few of these wives.  Most of them are married to officers, so they make good enough money that most of the time, the wives don't have to work.  But nine times out of 10, these women are educated as well, and have Bachelor's, even Master's degrees, but can't find work.  Perhaps this is specific to the Gulf Coast and the way the economy is down here on the regular (not just because of the recession), but it makes me sad that these women even had to choose love over career so young.  

If this sounds like a bunch of whining, forgive me, because that isn't my intention.  Rather, I simply want others to know what the job of Marine (or any other military really) wife entails.  I have learned to respect many of these women for the sacrifices they have made to not only be with the one they love, but to support that person in their dreams.  While there are some wives that I feel lack a certain amount of character (and you can use your imagination here, because I'm going to leave it at that), you run into that anywhere you go with any group of people.   

Sidenote: when I was looking for pictures to post with this blog, I googled "Marine wife".  This is what I found:

This is Katherine Cathey, a Marine wife.  Her husband, 2nd Lieutentant James Cathey, was killed in Iraq.

When the casket was brought home, Katherine asked if she could stay with him though the night in order to sleep next to him one last time.  The marines made up a bed for her.

These photos were taken by Todd Heisler of the Rocky Mountain News, who won the Pulitzer Prize for them, and brought me to tears when I saw them and read their story.

You can see/read more about Mrs. Cathey's story here